...stressing...

Things have been so crazy since the last time I blogged. It seems that my husband uses my laptop more than I do. I just haven't really had time or patience to sit down and blog.

The kids have still been back and forth to my in laws during the week. I feel like I'm gone so many hours a day that when I get home, there's just enough time to eat and go to sleep. Then of course our weekends are filled with family activities: parties, birthdays, football, etc. I LOVE the weekend family time but I feel like we're always on the go and just not being able to stay home and do nothing... you know?

Work is busy too. We actually just hired a new Catering Sales Manager. My old manager moved to Florida for her husband's schooling. I haven't been to busy with any of that, but for some reason things have picked up and I find myself more busy than I thought I would be. I still love my job though. I don't mind it at all. What I do is simple, I get it. They actually tried to get me to apply for the management position but I really don't think I can do it. Too much responsibility. I have enough on my plate as it is.

My church calling is the best. I love it. Our Young Women Presidency is so great. We're actually planning a musical fireside for next month. Our youth is even learning a song. OMG and I'm supposedly playing the piano for them too... I love that I somewhat know how to play, but when I have to play for big things, I panic. Tonight we had song practice and I sucked, bottom line. I have LOTS of practicing to do! But I love it. I feel like I should be doing more though. The girls are still shy around me, I think, and there are some that I know are comfortable around me, but others that I feel I should be reaching out to but I don't know how just yet.

So why am I stressing? I'm not really stressing... but I am... LOL... it's so hard to explain. I'm the type that will worry about every little thing... and I mean EVERY little thing! It's a bad habit that I need to break. Honestly, I use to stress myself out so much that I'd get sick. I still get it at times but I haven't for a while. I guess I've learned to control it better. But I need to control it a lot more. I think now, instead of stressing til I'm sick, I end up building up all these mixed emotions and "stress" inside me that I just end up shutting everyone out. I'm there, but I'm not. And I hate to admit this now but it was just a few weeks ago that I realized what I was doing. I felt really bad about it because my husband started to think it was his fault that I was acting this way.

My husband's the sweetest guy ever. He really knows what I like and don't like... the little things that I LOVE... how to make me smile... the right words to text me when I'm having a hectic day at work... just everything. And I guess I just wasn't communicating as much as I should've been and he knew there was something wrong. I finally just looked at him and just broke down and cried... out of no where!

Don't feel bad for me though... like I said, it was my fault that I kept it all in and I shouldn't be stressing as much as I do. Now that I'm talking about it openly, I feel like my "stress" is some kind of addiction or something... still not good!

But I've been working on it and things have actually started to work itself out. I'm still worried about a few things here and there but I just realized that I need to center my life and everything I do around the Lord, my kids, my husband and my family.

We'll see how things go within the next few weeks.

I'm still waiting to get some software to edit pictures... I've actually lost my camera about five times this month and found it in random places! It's been missing for about two weeks and just last night Shawnee walked into my room with it! LOL.

Anyways, hopefully this one made sense! I just needed to let it out. Don't think I'm crazy though... because I'm not! LOL. I swear. :)

...tell it like it is...

Work has been a little crazy these past few weeks. Not too bad, but still busy. I've been finding myself waking up as late as I possibly can, without getting fired of course, and dragging myself around up until the very second that I walk into work. It's pretty sad actually. But it's the truth.

So at the beginning of this week, one my co-workers and good friend forwarded an email to me that I just had to share!

UNIVERSAL TRUTHS

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

**This is funny because me and one of my really good friends at work would probably get fired for talking about the people, I mean things, we talk about via email! LOL.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

**100% Agreed. Especially if it's between me and my husband - that really sucks... for everyone! LOL.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

**Seriously!! Now there's not enough time in a day to get a nap in!

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

**Yup! It's a MUST!!

5. How in the world are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

**I just roll em up and put it in the back of the closet!

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

**Very good point! I would rather NOT write in cursive! LOL. I don't think I have since 4th grade maybe?!

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

**This is true, but I guess not very useful anymore since everyone has GPS... right?

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

**Sad, but true.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

**You know that's the truth!

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

**Hahaha... they sure do! Especially the ones about people's drunken days: "Those were during that time in my life when I was serving in Iraq..." OR when you sluffed school and got caught and you were about ready to pee in your pants when your Mom came to pick you up... and now it's a joke to everyone but they didn't remember the part about you getting your butt whipped?!! Yea, those are good stories to tell... not that that last one ever happened to me LOL.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

**Totally true! I usually feel this way right after lunch!

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

**Seriously! I don't collect Blue Rays but the same goes for old VHS movies... we had TONS and now we don't even have a VCR to watch any of them on!

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

**HAHA! Word has a mind of its own I swear!

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

**Pretty much!

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

**So true! But I can't complain... I do the same thing most of the time! If you didn't answer the first time, you're outta luck! LOL.

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking cute and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

**I'll be the first to admit... this is totally me! LOL. But it does make sense! LOL.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

**Tangi raises her hand. "Guilty."

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

**It's common sense really...

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

**Maybe some of you would agree with this but I guess I missed this commercial...LOL

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

**Haha...that and "avoid construction" or do they have that now?

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

**Yup! I can't think of one right now, but I know my kids will feel the same way. LOL. The movies they watch aren't bad but I know they don't really know what's really going on in some of them! LOL.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

**Haha.... this is totally me AND my husband! Until you drop everything on the way in or the bags rip! LOL. But I'm happy to say that I do use my kids at times like these... two bags per kid thank you! :)

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

**Doesn't everyone?! LOL.

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

**I would say that 90% of the time that I'm bored, the first thing I do is look in the fridge or start snacking...very bad habit!

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

**I probably do it three times at the most... after that, the other person is on their own!

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent an idiot from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

**It's a GREAT idea...why wouldn't you want to join in?! If my husband is driving in another car next to me and we come across a driver like this, we TOTALLY block them in! Haha... No, not road rage... just simply "enjoying the ride" LOL

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

**Guilty. I usually don't wash my jeans unless they actually have stains or dirt on them... their JEANS! Haha...

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

**Dumber & dumber every year!

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

**I don't know about this one LOL

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

** Who DOESN'T!?!?!

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

**That'll be around the same time I've lost all motivation at work...

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

**Yup! That's ME! LOL.

...fatboy...

Four years ago, we were two hours away from here in Ephraim where my husband was going to school at Snow College and I was nine months pregnant. It was one of the happiest days of our lives.

Our son, Matthew Ephraim Luapo Asiata was born.

Today we celebrated his 4th birthday!

I felt a little bad because his sister had a sleepover for her birthday this year and for his birthday, we didn't do much.

His aunties, Sega & Evette, took him out for his birthday on Thursday.

He LOVED it!

They took him to the batting cages and miniature golfing. He had so much fun! We might take him out this weekend to go bowling or something... one of his many favorite things to do!

Speaking of Sega & Evette, they made Fatboy's cake. Isn't is amazing?!?! His last birthday, Evette made him a Spiderman cake. He LOVED it! And they taste just as good as they look! Seriously, I never liked cake that much until Evette made chocolate cake one night... OMG! I was hooked.

So that was the cake before we sang Happy Birthday... then Fatboy's sister's helped him blow out the candles and Shawnee got started on the cake first... and then that was it! LOL.

Fatboy is such a blessing to our family. It just wouldn't be complete without him. As much as he gives his sisters a hard time, they are ALWAYS asking for him when he's not around. Nana usually doesn't like to sleep anywhere if her brother isn't sleeping over too... and Shawnee likes to irritate him just to see him cry LOL but he is really good to her though.

Happy Birthday Son!! Mommy & Daddy love you!!

...blogging...

When I first heard about blogging, I thought it was really just a waste of time. But after reading my cousin Kassie's blog and other people's blogs it got me more and more interested.

I'm the type of person that when I find something that I like to do or is taking on something new,

a thousand different ideas and "to do's" run through my head over and over about that one particular thing.

It sounds silly, but it's true.

Like when I got called to serve as the Young Women Secretary in our ward

I couldn't stop thinking about all the different activities we could do: camping, bon fires, sleepovers, scrapbooking, taking tons of pictures of each activity...

Just EVERYTHING!

That's exactly how I felt when I first started to blog.

I had so many different ideas and topics to blog about that I didn't know where to start.

And then when I did get started, I didn't like it or I would be over it and want to blog about something else.

I seriously have like ten posts on my settings that still needs to be published

But I just keep thinking up new things to blog about or I'm just over it.

Well, the reason for this post was mainly because when I told my husband about me blogging, he thought it was a great idea.

He was totally behind me, not that this is a really big deal but it kind of is LOL.

Then I told him that I wanted to start editing pictures... not TAKING pictures, just editing them and trying to make them look pretty LOL

He said "Whatever makes you happy baby."

So... here I am! Blogging away. More like blabbering.

BUT ever since I've started, I've been complaining to my husband that I need my own laptop. LOL

The one that we have belongs to my sister and just has so much junk downloaded on it that it's pretty slow.

Don't get me wrong, a laptop is a laptop but I just wanted one to call my own...

One that I can blog from...

One that I can load MY pictures on to and edit all I wanted without having to worry about "giving the laptop back"

You know what I mean?

Well... the easter bunny came a little late but on friday, after work, my husband surprised me with my very own!!

Now I can seriously do what I wanted to do all along.

I told him that I would set money aside until I had enough to get one...

Of course he knew that I was "all talk" LOL

He knows that I never like to buy expensive things... ever...

and he also knows that I'll "say" that I'll get it, but I never have the guts to.

But I am totally in love with it and I'm so thankful for him helping me get started.

I mean, blogging isn't the only thing I'll use it for... but I'm just thankful that he completes that part of me that wouldn't have been able to go through with it.

Hopefully this is making sense. It's kind of hard to explain.

But now that I have a new BFF :) I'll be trying to keep up with my blogs from now on.

Thanks Babe! I love it, I mean you! ;)

... why me...

Written on April 10, 2010:

This post is probably going to be a little different from my other ones but oh well, that's what blogging is all about, right?!?

When I was in high school, I didn't love dressing up, but I did like to try to look cute. Don't we all? Well, back then... I was always between a size 5 and 7... the good-o-days!! LOL. Now... well, now you don't know need to know what size I am! LOL. Did you really think I was going to tell you??! Ha! Never.

But in high school, I did wear a few shirts that would pull up over my stomach a little, not on purpose, but it would just kind of move up on its own... you know what I mean?! And I swear I only wore a bikini once... not even a bikini - a bra type top and shorts, NEVER the bikini bottoms, who does that?!? - because I was so insecure about my (then) size 5 body. I don't know what the heck I was thinking back then!!

Now, I can't even buy let alone touch a bikini! NEVER AGAIN. Not that I want to... it's just the fact of me knowing that I CAN'T wear one SUCKS! After having kids your body changes and let's just say I was one of the not so fortunate ones! LOL. I'm not complaining but I do feel like I might be the only one who suffers from this... LOL. I try to get back into shape but it's not just my "shape"... it's other things too that I would rather not mention... LOL...I always tell my husband that I should've wore everything I wanted to wear back then and that I should stop trying to "fit into stuff" now!

We took the kids swimming once in Heber at a friends condo out there and my sister-in-law brought a bikini up for me. OMGee!! When I put it on... the first thing that came out of my mouth: "This would've been soooo much cuter, 5 years ago!!!" Seriously! I'm not complaining I swear... the joys and blessings that come from being a mom can't ever compare but it would be nice to be strut'in my stuff at the pool once in a while!! Hahaha... NOT! I don't even like to swim that much anyways LOL but still... I wanted to blog about this anyway!

...movies...

I just realized that I haven't blogged for a while now... not good. But so much has happened that I've been wanting to blog about. Actually, I have three posts that are just waiting to be finished and "published" LOL. Not good either.

I've been so busy lately that I haven't had time to do much relaxing. But I'm not complaining.

We've been doing our weekly routine and coming home to an empty house, just to go to bed and do it all again the next day. I have to say though, on Tuesday, we finally did have chance to go home and do nothing! It was awesome! We had dinner in the living room and just sat on the floor and watched tv with the kids. Even my husband realized that we were actually home, sitting in OUR livingroom, watching OUR tv while my kids ran-sacked OUR house and not my inlaws' house! LOL. It truely was a great feeling.

So, after watching conference this weekend, I had a few (or a lot rather) things to work on.

First things first, my kids.

I've always thought about this but never really got into it that much.

I thought about how much time we (don't) spend teaching our kids spiritual things... gospel doctrines, stories...

Growing up, my parents bought us church movies, Book of Mormon tapes, Primary Sing-A-Longs... the fun materials that kids can easily learn from.

What do I buy my kids? Video games, doll houses, High School Musical Series, footballs, purses...LOL

Conference got me thinking that maybe, just maybe LOL I need to start educating my kids more about the gospel.

Of course they're still young but I know they'll remember the stories at least. I do.

In Sunday School we're reading out of Genesis and I can truely say that I do have knowledge of most of the stories we discuss all because of those movies my parents bought us.

My husband on the other hand, not that it's a bad thing, he doesn't know a lot of them and he suggested that we get those movies for HIM! LOL. But really though... I felt like I was lacking on yet another thing as a mother.

Some times I think, "Well, that's what Primary is for, right?!?!" LOL

Wrong. LOL. But it sounded good for a second... LOL... but I've realized that I need to start doing something.

Conference started on Saturday and it's Friday and I still haven't done anything about this LOL

BUT I will... we are - Matt and I.

Another goal to add to the pot.