...possibly mia again??

Yesterday, probably within less than two hours, we made our first decision towards what we've been striving for all these years. Matt got a call from the Minnesota Vikings offering him a chance to come out for training camp that starts next week. It was one of thee most greatest moments that we'll never forget. Funny thing is, it didn't really hit us until later that night. We didn't get to bed until almost 3am last night!

We were all smiles ever since. Even this morning as I was leaving for work, I woke up with a huge smile on my face and I just watched him sleep for a minute. I seriously couldn't be more happy for him right now. After the three months apart, sleepless nights, rough days after the draft... he never gave up and I never gave up on him. I've never wanted anything so bad for someone in my life. I just know what he's capable of and how hard he's worked to get where he is. After the draft, it literally broke my heart that he didn't get drafted. It was really hard for me to talk about it with him without crying about it... which didn't help at all because I'm suppose to be the strong one. I was suppose to be his supporter. I can't be balling my eyes out if I'm suppose to be his supporter. How the heck would that work?! It was rough. But after that happened, it brought us that much closer. He spent so much time with the kids and he loved every second of it. I loved coming home to him everyday after not having him home for three months prior to that. It's just the greatest feeling ever. I've always said it's the little things that count and they should never be taken for granted and it's so true. The simplest things... fixing the bed in the morning, picking me up after work, sending me random text messages throughout the day, surprise lunch dates... I can never get sick of it.

This morning I ran back in the house to grab something I forgot and when I walked back into our room, Matt was up. He said I just texted you... they want me there today. Today??? Today as in like within the next twelve hours today?! Ugh. Suck.

I mean duh we knew this would happen but it all just happened so quick, literally. We knew we would be apart for a few weeks... if the lockout ended sooner we would've been apart for months... but for some reason this time seems harder than the last. It didn't hit me until I took him to the airport that he wasn't gonna be home tonight. That he wasn't just gonna be gone for a few hours... he was gonna be gone for a few weeks. I hate it. I hate being apart. I feel like a part of me is gone when he's not around. It might sound cheesy but it's true. He's like my twin. I just don't feel the same when he's not around. I know you probably think I'm crazy and a bit obsessive but I'm being serious. Being apart is so hard and we both can't handle it.

I'm literally tearing up just talking about this. He called earlier and my mom talked to him because she didn't get to see him before he left. How about I had to hold back my ugly cry just from hearing her tell him that we'll be okay and he needs to do what he needs to do to get our family started. Seriously. You would think I was pregnant or something the way I've been almost crying whenever I hear anyone talk about him.

I can't promise I won't be a Debbie Downer but like I mentioned before, I need to be strong, for him. I want to be. If I'm not okay, the kids won't be okay and then Matt won't be okay because he'll be too busy worrying about us. I can't let that happen. Of course I love that things are working out and I wouldn't want him to give any of it up just because I miss him. That's dumb. LOL. I'm just being honest. It'll be hard. I miss him already and we've only been apart for ten hours.

No Skype this time. This'll be awesome. Good thing, there are ten flights a day and it's only a two hour flight... not that I've already looked it up or anything.

Oh Lord... give me strength to get through these next few weeks and be the best supporter, wife and friend to my wonderful husband and children.